Silly Me...

So I've been waiting to post until I have a good hour or so to myself.

Hah.

Hahaha.

*rolls on floor giggling until tears stream down her face*

*recovers*

You'd think I'd know better by now, wouldn't you?

Anyways. SO much has happened in the past week or so (or at least it seems that way to me) that maybe I do have a good excuse after all.

First of all, I am starting an ACT/SAT essay writing class courtesy of BraveWriter and Ms. Julie Bogart. I've used some of her material in the past, so I'm really looking forward to the class. I've been feeling in need of something to help me organize my thoughts and write them out clearly and coherently (as perhaps you might have been able to tell).

Second, college is *sigh* once more in "should-I-stay-or-should-I-go?" limbo. And I'll tell you why.

I recently received a part-time-job offer from a lady who goes to our church, whose son has a chromosomal abnormality called Duplicate 15q, or "Dupe-15q." Its side effects include sensory issues, problems with vision, hearing, and speech, and sometimes seizure disorders. And this tough little guy has it all. A friend of mine works has been working with him part-time for a couple years now, and the stories she tells me about him just make me want to cry, he sounds like such a sweetie! I'm so so so so so so excited to be given the opportunity to work with him, and it looks like it's a done-deal! There's only a little bit of paperwork to fill out. *jumps around excitedly*

However...

(In the sentences following I'm probably going to sound really selfish...I apologize sincerely.)

Since I'm now taking on two part-time jobs, it doesn't look like I'm going to be able to finish school when I was planning (what is that saying? Man plans and God laughs?), simply because I won't have enough time, between work and piano and family stuff.

I was talking all of this over with my mom the other day when I first got this offer from Mrs. P., and having extremely mixed emotions. I was thrilled to think that I might be able to work with Little Guy (that'll be his nickname), but at the same time I was so frustrated because I had thought I was going to be able to finish up highschool over this summer/early fall, take the SAT, and start applying to colleges so that I could leave home fall 2013.

My mother, ever the sensible one (love you Momma!), was trying to tell me that I didn't necessarily need to leave for college next year, and was even going so far as to tell me I could call it a "gap-year", if it made me feel better.

Well it didn't.

Fortunately, (for both my poor mother and myself), I had planned to go to confession and Mass that evening anyway, so I told myself if I had a little extra time in before Mass I would sit down and pray about it and see if that helped any.

As it turned out, I was the only one in line for confession, so I had a good hour and a half before Mass started. So after confession I sat down in a corner and said my penance, which was to read a card full of quotes from St. Padre Pio and Blessed Mother Teresa. My eyes immediately fell on a quote from Mother Teresa, admonishing those who don't trust in God's Will and His plan for us, even if it's something completely different from what we intended.

I couldn't help it.

I started crying. Right there in the church.

Luckily there weren't very many people there yet, other than a few elderly ladies who were praying the rosary.

Even Mother Teresa was telling me to get over myself. After I managed to pull myself together I asked that God would give me some sign as to what His plan was, because I was ready to listen now. It wasn't long before I got my answer.

In his homily, Father talked about Mary, and how we should all take her for our role model for accepting God's Will, no matter what He throws at us, and no matter when He sends us something we need to be willing to say "Yes Lord," and do it right then and there. Mary's obedience was all about trusting that God had a bigger and better plan for her, even when she couldn't tell where it would take her and the Baby Jesus.

It couldn't really have been more plain if He had put it up on a billboard with my name on it. And when I got home I emailed Mrs. P and told her I would accept the job.

The funny thing is, the family I've been working for during the past two years is starting therapy for their youngest girl, because we suspect some learning disability, or delay. And now I get this job-offer to work with another child with special needs.

Oh! And if the homily/quote signs were not enough, God really made sure I was getting the message...

This past Sunday I got ANOTHER part-time-job offer from another family in our homeschooling group who just had a baby with Down's Syndrome, and they're looking for an aid to help take care of him.

I'm starting to see a trend here...

I'm just wondering if there's any particular reason He wants me to know how to work with special needs children. Perhaps I'm meant to be an occupational therapist? I always thought it would be neat to work with the disabled. Or maybe someday one of my own children will be special needs. I don't know.

What I do know is I'm extremely grateful for the kick in the pants from Mother Teresa, and the billboard homily courtesy of Father, and all the job offers.

And I also know that I'll think of that those two things whenever I feel my inner-control-freak starting to kick in.

~Grace